How You can Embrace Change

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  • “It is not the strongest of the species that survive, nor the most intelligent, but the most responsive to change.” –  Charles Darwin

    So many people have a fear of change: changing jobs, changing relationships, changing cell phones, changing lanes….

    The good news is, we are all born with only two fears: the fear of falling, and the fear of loud noises. These are quite obviously for our protection. That being said, all the other fears are learned. And whatever is learned, can be un-learned.

    pexels-photoThus, we all learned (were taught) how to be afraid of aging, of riding a bike, giving a speech, auditioning, taking a test, asking a girl out, etc.

    One take on all this is that change does not have to be hard and scary, as many believe.  I believe it can be creative and actually fun!  You can actually embrace CHANGE:

    Control/Choice:  Jung said: “What we resist, persists.” Therefore, if you resist change, it will only be more overwhelming.  I always say, “Change is inevitable: one can either effect it or accept it.”  By effecting or accepting change, you are “making friends with it” versus resisting it.  Remember you always have a choice.  Try to see change as making or receiving new choices, whether they are your own or given to you by a well-intentioned entity.  This mindset just may begin to feel more natural and like you are in control.

    Health:  Our greatest resource. Enhancing your health enhances your adaptability to change.  Will being healthier, fitter make your problems go away? Of course not, but you will be much abler to solve them and feel better about yourself while you do.

    Attitude/Action:  The late psychiatrist/author/Holocaust survivor Viktor Frankl stated: “The last of the human freedoms is to choose one’s attitude in any given set of circumstances.”  Simply by asking yourself “What is good about this situation?” especially during a challenge, will allow you to tap into your creativity, get into action to resolve the situation positively, and decrease your upset or resistance.

    Novelty: We are novelty-seeking creatures by nature, some more than others.  It is easy to see this in our tastes in food, entertainment, movies, fashion, etc. In these realms, and more, we readily see that we LOVE change. If we did not naturally crave some degree of change, we would never experience boredom….only safety and security.

    Growth/Goals: Every living organism is growing: positively or negatively (resistance/abuse/entropy).  Goals allow us to control our positive growth and enjoy the path.

    Expression:  We are all dynamic, multi-faceted creatures. As you continually set and attain goals, you are ever-exploring, unfolding, and unleashing your unique self-expression.   

    Challenge:  What would you change if you knew you’d be successful?


    “Change is inevitable: one can either effect it or accept it.”

    Dr. Nancy B. Irwin



    Originally from Atlanta, Dr. Nancy Irwin was trained as an opera singer. In 1985, she moved to New York City to pursue a career as a stand-up comedian. She moved to Los Angeles in 1994 when she heard Hollywood was looking for more blondes… As a comic, she only worked about 30 minutes a day, and soon took up volunteer work in the community to give back. Nancy had an epiphany while working with the sexually abused adolescents at Children of the Night. This prompted her to leave the world of entertainment and pursue a doctorate in psychology. Dr. Irwin is in private practice as a pre-licensed psychologist and therapeutic hypnotist in Los Angeles, where she enjoys working with adults, adolescents, and children. She treats over 100 issues, but it is her mission to heal the sexually abused, as well as abusers. Dr. Irwin also is on staff at Seasons Recovery Center, a luxury rehab facility in Malibu. She is also the author of You-Turn: Changing Direction in Midlife (May 2008 and a frequent media guest on a variety of psychological topics.

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