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Joy Is A Practice

In the midst of our everyday routines, it is easy to forget how extraordinary — and fleeting — life is. It’s easy to think that this is just one day amongst many: one more coffee klatch with a friend, one more day of carpooling kids around. It’s easy to give our spouse or lover a distracted peck on the cheek as he zips out the door. It’s easy to throw on those ho-hum sweat pants because we’re “just running to the market.”

We can easily live as if our days are innumerable, but they’re not.

The secret to living an extraordinary life is remembering, as often as we can, what a miracle it is that everything lined up to land us here on Earth, experiencing moment-to-moment joy: seeing orange dragonflies, tasting lemon drops, hearing the sound of a piano from the second story of a house we pass at twilight. What a miracle it is that we are alive — sharing this days-are-limited journey with other living creatures.

I am not one of those naturally joyful people who has always gleefully bounded out of bed in the morning. I have a history of anxiety and depression. Things once got so bad I started to imagine ways to end my life. I wanted out.

And then by some grace, I was led to a meditation class. On one deep inhale of breath, I felt relief — a tiny pinprick in the iron wall of pain that was always closing in. That pinprick became a lifeline for me. I started to notice other extraordinary moments of “no pain,” like when my cat curled against me purring or the first bite of warm toast with blueberry jam. I noticed my mother’s handwriting on a care package, the smell of eucalyptus.

I learned to scan for these “pinpricks of light,” wonderful little celebrations. The more I looked, the more I found.

I realized instead of waiting for them to show up; I could create these moments. When I was feeling alone, I could paint a colorful card and send it to a friend. When I was scared, I could wrap myself in my grandmother’s quilt, brew some licorice tea, and read an inspiring book. I could ask the grocery clerk how she was and listen closely to her response. I could linger and share a laugh when my son walked out the door. I could wear my favorite “good” black velvet cloak anytime I wanted, especially “just to the market.”

Joy doesn’t just land on us; it is a practice. The best way I know to practice joy is to remind myself that my life and the people I love are gifts that can be taken away at any moment. I recognize what a gift it is to be alive this moment, right here and now —and to make the most of it. I look for and create extraordinary moments of joy and celebration. I can be that pinprick of light for someone else today. Wanna join me?

Sherry Richert Belul has spent the last twenty years practicing finding the gifts in everyday life. Using disappointment, depression, and anxiety as her teachers, Sherry has developed products and practices for celebrating ourselves, the people we love, and the shape of our lives — even when none of those look the way we had imagined.

A twenty-year Zen mindfulness student, Sherry is the author of Simply Celebrate: 101 Ways to Turn Ordinary Days into an Extraordinary Life and Present Perfect: 127 Creative, no-to-low cost, wow-'em gifts they'll never forget. She is currently working on Talk Yourself into the Life You Want: Using Audio Self-mentoring to Find the Guru within You.

Sherry is founder of Simply Celebrate, which is a business dedicated to helping people find more joy, color, connection, and spontaneity in life. Simply Celebrate offers coaching, books, and one-of-a-kind gifts that turn ordinary days into an extraordinary life. 

For more information, please visit SimplyCelebrate.net
This Post Has 10 Comments
  1. Thank you for a wonderful piece. Even as we shelter in place and hid our smiles underneath required masks, we can have peace and joy, it should not be taken for granted. This is a great reminder.

    1. Raye, thank you so much for taking the time to read this and comment. It means so much to me. You are so right — we can smile beneath these masks, even if the smile is hidden. We still feel the joy. 💥💓💥

  2. Thank you so much I needed to read this today
    Seems I’ve been struggling a bit with moments of tears. I’m healthy and blessed but have a bit of sadness inside with regards to the world at the moment and being alone
    Peace love health and blessings to all💕🙏

    1. Jeanie, I can feel your heart! There is such sadness right now, for sure. But none of us are alone. We can all “walk each other home,” as Ram Dass so beautifully says. Even from afar (like you and I), we can send each other light and goodness. We can remind one another of the tiny pinpricks of light in “ordinary” life. I am so glad you connected today. It means so much to me! 💥💓💥

    1. Werner, I so appreciate what you said about “joy vs accomplishment.” What a great thing to model for young people — and all of us! Imagine how different our lives would be if that were the measurement of success! 💥💓💥

  3. Sherry – as always – you know how to brighten up a person’s perspective. Here are my favorite lines from this post: “I learned to scan for these “pinpricks of light,” wonderful little celebrations. The more I looked, the more I found. I realized instead of waiting for them to show up; I could create these moments.” So true – we choose to find happy and memorable moments. They don’t have to be big, few things truly are in life. I find myself being even more appreciative of nature these days and it’s easier to do so this time of year with so many flowers blooming, streams of water moving well, and clear skies more of the time. I’m so grateful that I found your musings several years ago. Every week I look forward to what you share. You challenge us to seek out the good and also to share because then 2 or more people are happy. Last night I went through a large batch of pictures I had developed to send to my niece in prison (from day trips, our garden, and interior decor). She is always delighted to receive photo’s of the outside world. I send them to friends and family as well – via regular mail, text, or e-mails. It’s a small and easy way to share what you’re doing with your days and for them to see what interests you. Thanks Sherry for your special light.

  4. Virginia! YOU always brighten my day. I love hearing your stories of photos and flowers and countless other ways you bring light to people. You are a gem. Thank you for your love and connection. 💥💓💥

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