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It ought to be easy to forgive. However, forgiveness is hard and difficult.

Forgiveness is a choice. Forgiveness is there for you at any moment. You may really want to forgive someone or yourself, but how does a person begin to forgive? First think about what forgiveness means and what it does not mean.

People have a lot of misgivings about forgiveness. Some think they can’t forgive because it’s “too difficult”. The hurt may be too deep and the offense may seem unforgiveable. The offender may not deserve forgiveness.

Some find forgiving impossible to do. The anger can be so deep that there is no way to find peace. They may think forgiving will be excusing his or her wrongful actions. Forgiving can be the key to finding peace. Healing the hurts you didn’t deserve can be difficult and may seem to be impossible. But healing is possible through forgiveness.

Forgiving the person that hurt you deeply is the only way to heal the pain. The pain will not be able to heal itself. Forgiveness is necessary to healing and finding peace. The bitterness you hold on to is not hurting the person who offended you; it is only eating away at your heart and peace of mind. Until you forgive, you hold on to bitterness, hatred and anger and you can’t move forward.

Forgiveness is a beginning for creating your peace of mind. Forgiveness creates an opening for you to heal and allow yourself to be open to love and trust again.

Forgiveness does not mean to forget. It does not also mean that you condone what has happened to you. Forgiveness does not mean you have to reconcile with the offender or be friends with them.

Forgiveness means letting go of the negative feelings and thoughts that prevent you from healing and finding peace. By letting go of the anger and negative feelings it allows room in your heart for compassion, kindness and peace.

Try thinking about forgiveness and how it can change your life. Recognize the value of forgiveness and its importance to you.

To forgive is not a simple process but is worth the pain of going through. Forgiveness is possible in situations that seem impossible. Forgiveness will free you of your pain and past hurts.

Forgiveness is for you and has nothing to do with the other person. The act of forgiveness is truly a gift to yourself. By forgiving you take back control of your emotions. It is the key to being healed and finding peace. The three words, “I forgive you” can change your life for the better. Those three words can set you free.

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Pat Bluth is an author of From Pain to Peace—A Journey from Rage to Forgiveness, bereaved parent, licensed family therapist, grief facilitator, and speaker.

Pat holds a Master’s Degree in Community Counseling and is a certified Chemical Dependency Counselor. She has served as a Christian family therapist, facilitated hospice grief groups, and is a frequent speaker for Mothers Against Drunk Driving and other groups.

Following the death of her 17-year old daughter, Tammy, caused by a drunk driver, Pat co-founded Mothers Against Drunk Driving in her County. Pat is a trained victim advocate.

Pat’s passion has been spending her time educating and changing attitudes about drinking and driving. As a certified Toastmaster, Pat has spoken to thousands sharing her story of hope and healing. Pat speaks from her heart and has brought hope to many who thought life was hopeless after a tragedy. Her message of hope and healing has been an inspiration to thousands.

Her book, From Pain to Peace – A Journey from Rage to Forgiveness, is Pat’s compelling story tracing her journey from rage to forgiveness and healing. Visit for a free copy of chapter one. Discover how love and forgiveness can conquer and win over bitterness and rage. Our deepest hurts can be healed with God’s help.

For more information, please visit

This Post Has One Comment

  1. Excellent, Pat. Reminded me of something I learned a few years back and that really helped me change direction. Thanks again.

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