Skip to content

I’d like to tell you that you can be happy all of the time or that happiness is always about choice. But I can’t because I don’t believe it.

I know some people believe it and claim to live it. And if you’re one of them, I’m very happy for you… and even a little envious.

But for those who seek happiness because we aren’t happy all of the time, the best advice I know to give is this, “Happiness happens. Unhappiness happens.”

If you want to be happy you can’t ignore unhappiness. Sometimes our unhappiness is of our own making and more easily remedied because it’s about making changes in our life. Sometimes it really is a matter of deciding to be happy, by deciding what is really important.

Too often we’re unhappy over things that really don’t matter because we don’t want to look at the things that do matter. The things that require us to change, grow and become better people. So sometimes, happiness is a choice.

But sometimes unhappiness is caused by events beyond our control that simply take time to work themselves out either logistically or emotionally. Sometimes we have to co-exist with unhappiness. But it doesn’t mean we can’t experience happiness at the same time.

Happiness is a moment. Sometimes we have lots of them in a row. And sometimes they just show up randomly in unexpected places. That’s the beauty of happiness – it can be random, unplanned and unexpected. Or sometimes we anticipate a happy moment and it happens. Expected or unexpected, happiness happens to most everyone at some point in the day. However, it is up to us to notice our happy moments. It’s up to us to talk about our happy moments. It’s up to us to cherish our happy moments.

Despite unhappiness, happiness happens. Happiness is contagious. The happier we are, the happier the people around us will be. There’s a soulfulness to happiness. When we’re happy we vibrate at a higher frequency. We dream. We attract. We achieve. We make the world a better place.

So if you only notice one thing every day, make it your happy moments and the happy moments of anyone around you. Count them and celebrate them with zest and enthusiasm.

Avatar photo

Pamela Gail founded the Secret Society of Happy People in 1998 to provide a missing voice for happy people who want to talk more about happiness without other people raining on their parade. Her interactions with thousands of people from the happy to the unhappy, have given her a unique vantage point to better understand how we can be happy most of the time. 

She is the author of Don't Even Think of Raining on My Parade: Adventures of the Secret Society of Happy People (PJ Press, June 2000).

Pamela lives in the Dallas suburb of Lewisville, works in business development for a Fortune 500 company. In her "free time" she writes the Society newsletter and manages all of the Society's social media. She's also working on her next book, The Secret Society of Happy People's Happiness Handbook: Being Happy Most of the Time.

For more information, please visit

This Post Has 0 Comments

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *