There are some things in life we can control and some that we can’t. We all have dominion and mastery over our own lives. We have personal power and we get to use it or give it away as we choose. Unfortunately, many times we willingly give away our personal power without even thinking about it or realizing that it happened.
My friend Sally had a long-term happy relationship with her partner Bob. Recently, she left Bob because a friend told her some bad things about Bob. Rather than confront the situation or ignore the advice, she ran. When a situation like this happens, we have two choices. One, we can run away, or two, we get to choose what information we take in and act upon, and what we don’t. That choice is what I call personal power. It’s the power to decide what we’ll believe and what we won’t and what we’ll do in life and what we won’t.
Because we have such a strong human need for acceptance in our tribe, giving away our personal power is something that all us do from time to time.
Personal power- and giving it away, is a hot button for me because of past lessons I have learned, the hard way. Two major times in my life, I gave away my power to “the expert- someone who knew more than I did”. Both times I ended up in a mess because these experts made bad decisions and I allowed it to happen. Inside I was screaming, “You can’t do this, this isn’t right!”, but I quieted that voice to learn from the expert- even when it went against everything I felt inside.
It’s not always in our best interest to take advice from well-meaning friends, especially when they haven’t mastered their own life. Too many times we’ll take business advice from someone who’s struggling, marriage advice from someone who is single or parenting advice from a couple with no children. That’s just silly!
Don’t get me wrong, there are many times when friends and mentors can provide great advice and help us to see things in a different way. But that doesn’t mean that we shut down and just take orders- we still have the responsibility for our lives and ultimately have to make our own decisions. Using our own personal power, we’re able to gather the advice and wisdom, examine it, feel if it fits for us or not and then decide our course of action or inaction.
The greatest expert we’ll ever find is inside of ourselves. We already know the answers to the most important questions, yet in our insecurity we look for answers and validation outside of ourselves.
If we take an honest look, we can all find places where we’re compromising and giving away our own personal power right now.
The time has come to take it back. After all, if we’re the ones that will be stuck with the results of the decision, shouldn’t we be the ones making choices for our own lives?
Instead of listening to outside voices telling us what we should or shouldn’t do, reclaim your power. When we do so, it will have powerful ramifications throughout all aspects of our life. When we act from a place of confidence and realize that the greatest source of wisdom for us is and always has been inside of us, we take a giant step closer to success.
So after you read this, you decide. If it’s useful, take it in. If not, toss it aside. You are the master of your life and you are much wiser than you give yourself credit for. Go have a talk with the only person who knows what’s best for you- YOU!
If you want to trust someone, trust yourself first.