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Relationships are so important. When everything else has faded – our jobs, our possessions, even our health – it is our relationships that remain. They can contribute to a wonderful life or they can dismantle it piece by piece, sending us into the darkest depths of frustration. Lucky for us, there is a way to ensure that we always have good relationships. Learn and hold dear this simple truth: your relationships with others are simply mirror images of your relationship to yourself. 

Do you know yourself? Right now you are determining the quality of your relationships through your perceptions and your belief systems about yourself. Unfortunately, few of us truly understand these belief systems, and we never stop to question them. For most of us, they have long ago left the realm of belief. They are now truths – infallible and unquestionable. Here they are:

  • “You’re unworthy.”
  • “You’re ugly.”
  • “No one will ever truly love you.”
  • “Life is all about hard work and struggle.”
  • “You have to sacrifice to get what you want.”

Sound familiar? We all have these and many other nagging beliefs, though we do our best to drown them out to get on with life. I say. “STOP THAT!” Drowning them out is the worst way to handle them. The more you do so, the more they gain power over you. They will haunt you. No matter how many distractions you come up with – getting a better job, finding “less toxic” friends, learning how to truly “be yourself”– it doesn’t matter. These beliefs will keep whispering and your subconscious will keep listening, making you act accordingly. You can’t get off this train. That is why, in our ignorance, we create undesirable situations and difficult relationships.

To make real changes in life, we have to look within. We have to uncover and heal these faulty beliefs. If you begin to do this honestly, you will see your life begin to shift. Though that is lovely, it’s not the best part. The best part is that if you do it long enough and with enough dedication, you’ll eventually abandon the whole approach entirely. You will realize, through your constant explorations, that all of these belief systems, all of these oh-so-important convictions, mean nothing. They mean nothing because they belong to your personality, and your personality is a finite experience that will eventually come to an end.

You are infinite. You are one with us all. 

Can you imagine how your relationships would improve if you came from that perspective? What if you could experience in your daily life your true, unlimited self?

You can. You just have to show yourself through dedicated exploration that you are not your personality, your feelings, nor your belief systems – you only believe you are! Shift that belief and wake up to the infinite you. Then your “personality” will be an expression of your love for yourself, which makes your relationships reflect exactly that. Wouldn’t that be a nice change?!

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Sara Chetkin was born in Key West, Fl in 1979. When she was 15 she was diagnosed with severe scoliosis, and spent much of the next 15 years traveling around the world seeking healing and spiritual insight. These travels and explorations are the basis for her first book, The Healing Curve.

She graduated from Skidmore College in 2001 with a Bachelor of Arts in Anthropology. After graduation she moved to Somerville, MA where she pursued an education in herbal medicine as well as in spiritual studies at Delphi University in McCaysville, GA. In 2004 she began a master’s program at the New England School of Acupuncture, and in 2007 earned a Master of Science in Acupuncture and Oriental medicine.

She is a Ro-hun therapist and an Ordained Minister with the Church of Wisdom, Delphi University. She lives in New York State with her husband, Brecht, and their son, Adrian.

For more information, please visit TheHealingCurveBook.com

Comments (3)

  1. Wow Sara. It’s amazing how I read inspiring words like this, it hits home. I share these words with other people. I did a lot of work on myself, the inside job, and changed how I viewed myself, and come back with a new me. Did more work to become the man I wanted to be. I look in the mirror, and tell myself that I love who I’m becoming.
    You must know me, because you heard me say those exact words. I’m being totally honest with you. No lie.
    Patrick

    1. Thank you for sharing, Patrick! Isn’t it amazing how, when we go within, we almost always come to the same conclusions? This proves to me that we are all truly from the same source, just expressing it in a million different and beautiful ways. Much luck and joy to you!

  2. Thank you for sharing, Patrick! Isn’t it amazing how, when we go within, we almost always come to the same conclusions? This proves to me that we are all truly from the same source, just expressing it in a million different and beautiful ways. Much luck and joy to you!

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