Inspiration Archives

Ask a Luminary

How Can I Fix a Friendship?

"Will a friendship I lost a year ago have a chance to be repaired?" ~ Karin, Dresser, WI Hi Karin, I’m sorry you’ve been without your friend for a year now. Whether your relationship with him/her can be repaired or not depends on each of you and your individual wishes about this. Without having details, I can only offer some general suggestions. The first thing to do is to reach out to your friend and let him/her know how much you miss your relationship and how you would like to become friends again. It’s very important when you do this…

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Don’t Believe Your Fears

I like to think I am fearless, and in many ways I am. But in some ways I am not. One of the most noticeable ways is in regards to my business. I fear not having enough income to pay my bills. I fear I will not be able to make the business what I want it to be. I fear that I made a mistake making my passion and purpose my business. The problem is when I listen to my fears and believe them, I make bad choices. If I believe I won’t have sufficient income, I feel it…

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Ask a Luminary

How Can I Respond to Financial Obstacles Positively?

"My husband and I keep getting hit hard financially. One bad break after the next, I feel like I'm drowning. It has to get taken care of, so it will, but how do I go about life without feeling totally defeated?" ~ Laura, Louisville, KT Dear Laura, It is such a challenge not to say “No!” when life circumstances show up in a way that you don’t prefer. The game is to leave your history alone and move forward. When you judge yourself or others for why things are the way they are, then things get heavy and it makes…

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What We Learned From Our Mothers

Happy Mother's Day! Chances are, she taught you how to tie your shoes, kissed the boo boos when you fell down and believed in you when no one else did. On this Mother's Day, we celebrate the woman that not only made our life possible, but the one who did her best to help us be the best person we can be - our mother. As a tribute to all of the great mothers, we've compiled some of the many things we've learned from our mothers, as shared from more than 100 folks on Twitter. (Check out our blog to read each individual…

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Ask a Luminary

How Can I Move Forward from My Mistakes?

"Could you please share with me how can I get over my past mistakes and actions? 7 months ago I had a terrible fight with a friend of mine, whom I had feelings for. It was a long distance relationship. Due to anger and rage, I communicated harsh words to her. I tried apologizing but she's not ready to take my calls and has blocked me off all social networking sites and hasn't communicated since. I terribly feel her absence and I'm down with guilt. Every day thoughts of her keep running through my mind. I feel that if I'd…

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Making Room for Loss

If you found Dr. Eva Selhub's recent Ask a Luminary response on loss valuable, we invite you to read her more in-depth look at this topic today. I am often asked by my clients and friends alike how they can possibly manage or get over the loss or death of a loved one. My answer to them is always the same. You don’t “get over” a loss, you make room for it. What do I mean by that? When someone you love dies, it is appropriate for you to feel grief.  You miss their laughter, their strange quirkiness, their voice…

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Ask a Luminary

Should I Take the First Step in a Relationship?

"Two weeks ago my crush sent me a friendship request on Facebook and he told me that he likes me. I was so happy but since then we haven't talked. I texted him once after that but the last message is always mine -- I feel like he's not interested in me anymore. The sad part is that I will never see him again after this week , he's going to another country! And I don't know if I should tell him that I like him or not -- what if he ignores me and I'll look so stupid? What should I do, please?" ~…

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Working for a Living

Recently whenever I talk to a client or friend about their job, I hear: I have lost the passion for my work. My co-worker undermined my project. It seems we only shuffle paper and no longer provide anything of true value. My boss took credit for my work. I have to work overtime again, without pay. There is too much work to do. I am completely overwhelmed. Once again, I had a nervous breakdown in my office. There are many reasons we feel this way. The economy tanked out in 2008 and led to layoffs but the same amount of…

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Ask a Luminary

How Can I Get Over the Death of a Loved One?

"I lost both parents within a year, very unexpectedly. I still pick up the phone to call them and feel such an ache inside. How do I fill this void?" ~ Jeri, Poughkeepsie, NY Dear Jeri, Your first step is let go of your goal to “fill this void.” I am not sure we ever completely get over losses; we learn to fill our lives up with other good things so that we do not feel the loss as much. Right now, you need to grieve. It is how the body and mind heal. The loss is a big hole in…

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Step into an Unthinkably Confident Relationship with Life

Looking to the past for guidance on how to make a new beginning is like asking an echo to show you where it got started. We do not need to think in order to know the right thing to do in the moment for ourselves, or for others! In fact, quite the opposite is true. The amazing possibilities that appear with each present moment are literally beyond thought. After all, the best moments in our lives -- those priceless times when we feel most alive -- unfold without our taking a single thought about them. That unforgettable sunrise we shared…

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Ask a Luminary

What Do I Do About a Cheating Spouse?

"How can I keep hope when I know my husband is cheating and dishonest? He pretends all is fine, but I am the one who is suffering inside. My only solace is talking and praying every day to my Lord Jesus, God, Immaculate Virgin Mary, St. Anne her mother and St. Joseph along with the Holy Spirit. I gave my vows at the Altar when I got married 30 years ago. It's hard to show emotions toward him when I know what he's doing. What can I do? Do I just put on a face and pretend, and be the victim?" ~…

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Machu Picchu

The Catalyst

At first I didn’t know why I felt so poorly. I thought that it might just be due to my new job filled with travel, deadlines, and an ever-changing focus. My stress-levels increased while my exercise decreased. My eating habits became poor as processed, prepackaged convenience foods and the perceived need for caffeine became the norm. Even when I tried to eat better, the weight still kept coming on and my digestive system was erratic. I began to have health issues with seemingly no source. My menstrual cycle was horrendous with heavy flowing for weeks, not days, excruciating pain piercing…

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Ask a Luminary

Can Meditation Make Me Happier?

"I find the world to be filled with sadness, and sometimes, I honestly don't want to be here. I've tried anti-depressants but I don't like the side effects. I'd like to take control of my life and change my attitude, but I don't know where to start. Any suggestions?" ~ John, Boulder, CO Dear John, First, you’re right to have stopped taking the anti-depressants. They do cause unwelcome side effects and they do nothing to get to the root of depression. My answer to this question might surprise you somewhat, but firstly I’d advise looking at ways you can give…

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Bouncing with Style: Toxic Ex-Partners

Last night I was on a panel of experts talking about toxic relationships. One of the experts identified 6 or 7 things people do in a toxic “ex” relationship.  No one falls neatly into one category and people can and often do exhibit more than one of these toxic behaviors. The only problem I had with her presentation was that it was filled with psycho-babble-ease that left me stumped with the fancy terms. So I put it in terms that we can all understand and have a good chuckle! The Big Buttinski This person interferes with your new relationship. It…

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Ask a Luminary

Am I Supposed to Ignore Money?

"The area of struggle for me is money. Manifestation concepts say that you should be thinking about what you want, feeling it, and imagining what it would be like to have it. However, when I have read the concepts of manifesting money it seemed to say not to focus on it but rather to focus on gratitude of the money I currently have. This leaves me rather confused. I daydream daily about having money and the things I would do with it, I have no problem feeling the freedom and abundance that would come with having money. Is that wrong?…

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At One with Your Circumstances

There have been many times in my life, and still some today, when I fight reality. I want a different outcome. I desire for things to be different than they are. I pray for divine intervention to change the facts. What usually occurs are that the facts remain and all I have done is create pain and disappointment for myself. It is said that what we resist, persists. What if instead of resisting, we accepted? Recently I was introduced to the Navajo word “Hozho.” It is the most important word in the Navajo language. Roughly translated it means peace, balance,…

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Sunset over the Ocean

To Have More Happiness, Eat Peas and Grapes! Part 2

Welcome back.  I trust that you have explored holding the energy of Ease and that you’re finding it serves your feelings of happiness to do so. Let’s continue with how being in Ease helps you experience Peace. Ease is the surface layer of this deeper inner state. Peace is your State of Being beyond resistance. A place we all strive to get, and yet, there’s only one place to go to arrive there. Peace is within the Essence of you, the inner state of allowing and trust, the space of unequivocal knowing that everything is exquisitely right, that all is…

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