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Ask a Luminary

“My kids are driving me crazy. How can I get them to do what I want them to do, when I need them to do it?”

Your kids are seeking appreciation, validation, and security, just as we all do. You get whatever you are prepared to give so get yourself into a collaborative frame of mind.

1. Identify what needs to be done. What are the responsibilities or tasks that your child must complete? Help your child understand the long term value of this project. For example, they are developing problem-solving skills, collaboration skills, research skills, computer skills, and identifying their personal interests at the same time.

2. Brainstorm with your child to help them break the project down into simple steps. Help them identify the resources, tools, and people who can help them accomplish each step.

3. Specify when each step will be completed. Put the steps and deadlines on the wall as a poster so your child sees it every day.

4. Collaborate with your kids to determine what sort of environment helps them be most productive. Remove distractions, encourage hourly breaks for water and stretching, and jointly come up with incentives and restrictions that help your kids stay committed to action.

5. Celebrate small steps every single day. Acknowledge what’s working; the progress they are making, the new skills they are learning and how those skills will be used later. Help them get curious about what might be next.

Elaine Starling

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Elaine founded Promise Power because she believes that each person is endowed with a passion and a unique reason for being. As we harness that passion, we can achieve great success—however we choose to define it—and use our talent to help others find the light within themselves. Elaine was inspired to create Promise Power in 2006 when she saw the need for unique tools that help people pay attention to their dreams so they will take action that makes them come true. Her determination to inspire millions of women to fulfill their promises drives Elaine to share her experiences and learning.

With over 23 years of international advertising experience, Elaine started Starling Media Services, Inc. to support clients who need strategically integrated media and marketing plans. She brings a strong customer focus to her work and delights in engaging stakeholders to create innovative solutions that address specific challenges. Her clients range from high tech to consumer goods, video games, and business-to-business firms.

Elaine has served as President and Board Member of Women In Consulting and is actively involved in the American Marketing Association. An engaging public speaker and prolific author, Elaine has written numerous articles and is currently working on her book, Maximize Your Promise Power.

To fulfill her own promise, Elaine and her husband moved to the Sierra foothills where she hikes, cares for her vineyard and orchard, and makes wine.

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