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One simple question can literally change your life: “How can I serve you?”

I am using the word literally very specifically, so please allow me to explain. It all started with Neale Donald Walsch at the Celebrate Your Life conference sharing his belief that “your life is not about you…but who you touch and in how you touch them….” Whether you agree with that statement and to what extent is beyond this particular post. What is, on the other hand, is an interesting perspective and a question that occurred to me while thinking through Neale’s speech.

In our lives, we most often think from the perspective of “I”. What’s in it for me?, as crude as it sounds, seems to be at the core of what we do and how we treat others. We are taught differently and would like to think of ourselves differently, however I believe we will agree that for the most part that is true.

That being said, a simple application of the question “How can I serve you?” before you do anything can help you get out of the Ego and into your Heart. That in turn has a tremendous number of benefits. For instance:

  • DistancePhysical Effects
    • Raised vibration leading to all sorts of health benefits as well as clearer guidance
    • Better flow of energy through the body due to releasing of the blocks that we normally put up so as NOT to harm ourselves (since we most often focus on that and not the other)
  • Calming Effect
    • Irritation ceases because we switch focus from what we like to what the other person likes
  • Parenting
    • With kids, you cannot work while they are around you. If you do, you will not be able to multitask effectively and get very frustrated. By asking the question, you are putting the whole emphasis on them and be fully involved making it more fun for both you and your child
  • Relationships
    • All the things you don’t like about another person will dissipate because it is not about you but rather them.  You will start to appreciate their uniqueness
    • You will achieve much greater physical and emotional intimacy
  • Career
    • Satisfaction from doing something that helps another (no matter what career) will make you a better employee
  • Law of Attraction
    • One of the main blocks from attracting is selfish focus. If your focus is on helping others, you are able to attract much quicker since it serves many, not just you.

In truth there are so many ways that your life can be improved by just reminding yourself of this question periodically.  So anytime you find yourself irritated, frustrated, not loved, etc., just ask “How may I serve you? and see what happens.

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Allen Vaysberg is the founder of School of Human Potential and a successful entrepreneur who within the IT consulting industry built several multi-million dollar businesses. Although he was living the "American Dream", deep inside he knew something needed to change because even with all his successes, he still felt unfulfilled. Thus he began his transition away from IT.

He discovered that in order to live a fulfilled life he needed to pursue his soul’s purpose. By taking charge of his destiny and following his dreams Allen finally found peace and felt complete. Today he inspires individuals to live their essence and assists them in re-calibrating their lives. He does so through many different mediums including his coaching practice “Recalibrate Your Life”.

Allen is a Motivational Speaker, Syndicated Talk Show Host, Life Purpose Coach and Best Selling Author. His weekly radio program "School of Human Potential” brings guests ranging from Lisa Williams to Yakov Smirnoff and everyone in between.

For more information, please visit and

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