A Conversation With God?

About a month ago I sat in front of my laptop with some heavy thoughts on my mind. In trying to figure out a difficult situation, I gave up and just started typing the first statement below. Rarely do I get to a place where I momentarily crash, but I was tired and was venting in frustration. From there my fingers kept typing and here are the  responses that I “heard” in reply to my questions.

I’m not sure this came from the Universe, God, my higher self, my imagination or whatever else. What I do know is that I felt better at the end of the dialogue than I did in the beginning. So does it really matter where it came from?

I normally wouldn’t share this with you, because 99% of the time I’m a very positive person. I’m exposing this vulnerable side of me to you for two reasons… 1) so that you know you’re not the only one that feels this way at times, and 2) so that this might help you. I’ve shared this with several friends recently who all told me I have to share it with you too…. so here it is.

My questions are in blue…. the answers I “heard” are in black.

If you too are going through a difficult time right now, I hope it helps you to see things in a different way…..

I know I’m not my problems but sometimes it sure feels like I am. Why does it have to be so hard?

That’s what I’m here for. Those are the times for you to lean on me.

I don’t know who you are or that I even believe in you, at least not in the way I was taught as a child.

You don’t have to know who I am or believe in what man has said that I am in order to lean on me. Lean on that greater Universal source, that inner knowing, something bigger than yourself. Lean on “that”- that’s me anyway. 🙂

I want this situation to be over. I want to be done with this. I want to stop worrying about this.

All things in the right time. Just because things seem to be going in a direction that you don’t like, or taking longer than you’d like, doesn’t mean it’s not all perfect to me. You’re only seeing a piece of the puzzle. Trust me that this will all make sense, soon.

But I don’t like feeling the pain.

Then don’t feel it.

That’s so much easier said than done! I don’t want to feel this way. I just do.

Then choose to feel a different way. Choose the feeling you want to have.

How can I just “choose” to be happy? When I feel scared it’s hard to fake it and act happy.

Then don’t fake it. Find some aspect in your life to be happy about- genuinely, and celebrate that. The rest will fall into place from there. You’re making this too hard.

Why are things so screwed up? Why would I have created this situation?

What have you learned from all of this?

I’ve learned not to give away my power to others and to trust my own intuition. I’ve learned to listen to the voice inside. I’ve learned the depth of my own resilience.

Bingo.

Okay, now that I’ve learned it, can’t we just wave a magic want and make the situation go away? Why does it have to be so difficult for so long?

It will go away only when you see that “it” IS separate from you. You are not your problems. You’ve forgotten your own magnificence, or this wouldn’t hurt you so much. You’ve forgotten that you are an infinite being with unlimited potential. You know the words, but sometimes you let the fear replace the meaning behind these words. Reconnect to your own magnificence and the fear will go away.

That sounds good, but what do I do when I feel the fear in the pit of my stomach?

Trust. Trust that the answers will be shown to you, just as they are being shown to you now. Trust that there is a higher reason for everything. And I mean everything. Trust that when you feel the most alone or the most frightened is when I am the closest to you. Let go of the fear and allow me to be there with you and for you. You don’t have to do this alone unless you choose to do so.

I just want it to be over.

Then let go of the outcome. Don’t allow the fear- that negative energy- to have an effect on you. Let it go as you would something that doesn’t matter to you. Allow it to “not matter” and it will be gone.

How do I make it “not matter”?

By realizing what does matter and filling yourself with that. You can only have one thought at a time, so choose a good one. Choose thoughts that empower you. Choose ones that bring happiness and joy into your life. Choose love. As easy as it sounds, only when this situation no longer matters to you, will it no longer matter to you. I’m not being tricky here- I just want you to really understand this. It’s your choice. It’s only painful if you choose for it to be painful. The situation itself doesn’t have the power to make you feel anything- good or bad, or anything at all. That all comes from your reaction to the situation. Whatever feeling you choose comes from your choice. So make it “not matter” by focusing on something else that you care about. Give your attention to what DOES matter and what doesn’t will go away.

But I’m afraid of the worst that could happen.

Laughing- haven’t I always been there for you? Haven’t I always taken care of your needs?

So far, yes.

Then why would you stop trusting me now?

Because I’m afraid.

That’s when I want you to trust me the most.

But you’re just a figment of my imagination…. I created you, didn’t I?

Actually, you are a part of me, and I am a part of you, and we created each other. How else do you think you could hear this voice in your head? Where are these answers coming from?

So you really are there.

Yes. Always have been, always will be. It’s impossible for it to be any other way. You’re kinda stuck with me. 🙂

So if the worst thing that I can imagine happens, you’ll still be there?

Yes, I’ll still be there. But, how about if we don’t even go there as far as imagining the worst that could happen? How about we imagine the BEST that could happen and let’s focus on that?

I can do that.

Cool. I was hoping you’d say that. So now, take a deep breath and tell me about your dreams…..