Have you done everything you can to accommodate your difficult or emotionally abusive person, but the relationship stays the same? Where is God in this pain? The Time Will Come offers encouragement, hope, Godly wisdom, and insight as you travel through life with this person. Betty Hawley Scott writes of her personal encounters with God and insights and knowledge she has gained through her experiences and observations of emotional abuse. As a retired public school counselor, she uses her counseling skills to encourage you to see life events from God’s unique perspective. The Time Will Come empowers you to: • heal from emotionally abusive relationships • live with dignity and confidence • help and understand others who struggle with a difficult person • stay encouraged • know that God has not forgotten you.
I have learned that life is intelligent and moves to higher and higher orders of complexity and adaptation. And we as humans have the capacity to develop multiple types of intelligence and to adapt to the increasingly complex world we face. I grew up believing that “intelligence” was one thing – what we call IQ. I worked hard and got good grades at a really tough college. I thought that would prepare me for life. What I realized by my late 20s was that there were other forms of intelligence that mattered a whole lot. Specifically, we also need emotional… Read more.
Perhaps the most important thing I have learned in this extraordinary life is that we are responsible for our own happiness. It is not determined by anything outside of ourselves even though it often appears to be. The rich can be miserable (“Oh, I’m so unhappy. I wanted Johnson to drive me to Tiffany’s in the Lamborghini but now I have to go in the stupid Rolls. How awful.”) And the poor can be joyful (“Ah, there is enough food for the whole family this year. We are so blessed.”) With that reality we have tremendous power; we can stop… Read more.
Compassion, love, courage, patience, kindness, forgiveness and faith. These are basic tenants found in most philosophies, spiritual practices and religions globally. These are also answers to many of the pains that you may experience. Find out the power of these principles through practice. It seems that there is always an opportunity to express one if not all of these in any given situation. In dealing with hardships, pain or confusion it seems that there are always two roads to take – one of faith and love or one of fear. Having a daily practice of some sort allows for mindfulness… Read more.
We have more power to design our life than we think.We don’t control what happens. We can, however, control our response to what happens. Every moment…now, and now, and when tonight becomes now… is a choice point. Who are you willing to be? Courageous? Compassionate? Clear? What will you put on your TO NOT DO list? Checking your phone every 5 minutes? The choosing that enlivens us originates from a creator mind-set, not a victim’s. See your positive power. Sure, there’s negative power over others, but there’s also the power to and with. The power to create with others originates… Read more.
I invite you to be kind and listen. Some of you may know this as empathy or compassion, or the concern for what people are feeling and needing. I would invite you to practice the empathic thought…”I wonder what’s going on for this person?”, or “I wonder how I can be of service to them?” Learn to see empathy as more than just ‘swapping shoes’. Empathy is an action plan, a practice where we guess what people are feeling, along with a language where we ask them if they’re feeling what we are guessing. See empathy as an action where we act… Read more.
Many of us spend much of our lives searching for happiness and peace of mind. However, some never find them, and the reason is that they’re looking in all the wrong places. They think they’ll be happy once they acquire a certain amount of material wealth and possessions. While these things can bring us temporary pleasure, they don’t bring us real happiness, or peace of mind. If we want to be happy and at peace, then we need to look somewhere else. A wise prophet once told us many years ago that whatever we sow, so shall we reap. Those… Read more.
World peace begins with inner peace. Your greatest impact on others and the world will only come when you have looked deeply inside and made peace with what you find there. But what if what you find makes you squirm? What if you hate what you find? The answer is love; it is always love. The person you need to love most–who most needs your love–is YOU. Loving and caring for yourself first isn’t selfish, it’s self-full. This means caring for your Self with gentleness and compassion. If you need to forgive yourself or others, do it and the energy of… Read more.
The main thing is to be alive, to welcome whatever comes and bring compassion and soulfulness into our every encounter.
The truth that I would like to share with fellow beings is that there is a source of wisdom, joy and peace that anyone can draw upon. That source has nothing to do with the desires of the physical body, or the self-centeredness of the egoic mind. Yet it is to be found within each of us, accessible by simple means and eager to sustain and nourish the part of us that aspires to a loving, compassionate connection with humankind. Source has many names in different spiritual traditions. Some call it spirit, love or the higher self. Its name is… Read more.
We can choose to grow habits of the mind and the heart that will guide us naturally to love and service. We can blossom through presence and good mental habits to awaken our authentic spirit. Love is the common denominator. Love is the universal energy of the universe. The human condition is enduring; adversity will forever ascend. The impact of adversity can be an insidious virus or rich nourishment for our souls. We can choose to use adversity as nourishment to awaken our authentic spirit. Our authentic spirit is our love, which we are, and our service, how we act…. Read more.
Every single person on this planet shares the same desire… Happiness! It is how we imagine our happiness that differs from one person to the next. So what is the key to happiness? Today I would like to share three of the things that I have discovered that have brought me the gift of happiness and revolutionized my personality. 1. Appreciate everything and express gratitude. To live gratefully you simply need to become aware that every single moment is a GIVEN MOMENT. You have not earned it or brought it about in any way, and cannot assure that there will be… Read more.
Last week I shared Dr. Jill Bolte Taylor’s TEDx Talk with you and the idea that choosing to stay angry affects both your body and your mind. This week I’d like to share another powerful concept that Dr. Jill makes: that we are feeling creatures who think. We are not thinking people who feel, yet this is what our society believes and values – which is at the heart of many of our issues. Here is the science and biology behind it. Our limbic system is constantly asking, “Am I safe?” If things feel familiar to our limbic system, then we feel calm and safe. The system… Read more.
“Dear Sara, I grew up in Canada in a dysfunctional family with alcoholism, emotional abuse and neglect, then moved with my family to New Zealand when I was a teenager. My mother was unable to show any love or affection and I have tried for many years to seek approval and my mother’s love. My childhood and adolescence had a significant impact on my mental health and happiness. I thought I was a bad person until I completed a social work degree and realised that my mother was not capable of loving and learned about childhood conditioning. My sister was… Read more.
The greatest, most abundant resource on planet Earth is also its least understood and utilized. Its unlimited supply is found virtually everywhere, anytime, and under all circumstances, even though few recognize its real value. What is this most precious collective resource? It is our relationships. Consider these truths: It is within relationships that we grow as individuals in everything valuable, because it is through them that we become stronger and wiser, allowing us to realize a love that transcends our unseen self-limiting self-interests. Yet, even though we may acknowledge the existence of this path to self-perfection, the essential mystery of… Read more.
“Could you please share with me how can I get over my past mistakes and actions? 7 months ago I had a terrible fight with a friend of mine, whom I had feelings for. It was a long distance relationship. Due to anger and rage, I communicated harsh words to her. I tried apologizing but she’s not ready to take my calls and has blocked me off all social networking sites and hasn’t communicated since. I terribly feel her absence and I’m down with guilt. Every day thoughts of her keep running through my mind. I feel that if I’d… Read more.
The most important piece of wisdom I wish to share with humanity is that on the grand scheme of things, what matters is how you treat one another, beginning with yourself. How you treat yourself gives others permission to treat you the same way, for we are all each other’s mirrors. If it weren’t for our outer mirrors, then we might not see ourselves as clearly when times are tough. Our quality of life could become more worthy and meaningful if we all practiced compassion. Compassion begins at home. You need to be gentle with yourself, reward yourself when due,… Read more.
Recently I offered several workshops focusing on self-compassion. I began each one by saying, “This weekend is a project in non-self-improvement.” This statement was often followed by laughter and then a slow realization that gradually revealed a premise that nearly every one of us carries: We must always be improving, forever trying to make ourselves better, thinner, more spiritual; in a word, perfect. For many of us, it is our primary motivating concern. Hidden under this pressure is a belief that says, “Unless I improve, make myself better, bordering on perfect, I will continue to live outside the circle of… Read more.
Remember that you are not alone. Just when you think you are, God sends an angel your way to remind you. The morning my husband was scheduled for triple by-pass surgery, I found myself in a waiting room, alone, and trying desperately not to cry in front of strangers. God sent me an angel, a pastor we did not know from a local church we had never attended, to comfort me and pray with me. This was just one of many times in my life that God used to remind me that I am not alone. Praise each day. It… Read more.
I would share three bits of advice that have guided me and served me well in my life. 1. Always do your best. When you do your best, you will be proud of yourself. Being proud of yourself increases your self-confidence. I believe that self-confidence is an important key to success, in your career and in your life. Beware however: doing your best means that you are laying it on the line. When you do your best, you know that you have no one but yourself to blame if things don’t work out like you want. 2. Treat everyone with… Read more.
One of the keystones to cultivating a perspective that brings greater fulfillment and happiness is the attitude of gratitude. By ACTIVELY seeking things to be grateful for and appreciate, we begin to see things from a higher perspective. We see the sacredness and the perfection of life, as it is. That doesn’t mean we can’t shoot for an upgrade too, but we might as well enjoy where we are in the moment as well. I maintain, it’s not what happens to you in life, it’s what you do with it. Perspective is everything. Once I was walking down a street… Read more.